Ann Quasman asked me, “What would people be surprised to know about you?” Ann’s question came in the context of her WomanTalkLive5 where she asks five provocative questions of “an inspiring and fabulous woman – a woman with something to say. ”
I love Ann’s goal: To each day start a conversation that moves even one woman from talking to doing.
But in all honesty, I didn’t feel particularly inspiring or fabulous in the moment. After wasting precious time wrestling with my voice-in-head that was saying, “just buck up,” and “hey Ann, that’s not fair, that makes it six questions,” here’s what I shared:
People would be surprised to know that I once did the voice-over for a hemorrhoidectomy (hemorrhoid surgery) video used at an international proctology conference. Even 20 years later, the thought of using my voice that way makes me giggle. Talk about the perfect fodder for jokes!
It’s true. That’s one way I’ve used my voice.
Locked in a recording studio with a Japanese crew, I can still hear myself saying, “Now, take the rectal speculum…” Hope the proctologists at the Seoul conference weren’t listening too carefully: I had absolutely no idea what I was talking about. Ever get that feeling?
“It took me quite a long time to develop a voice, and now that I have it, I am not going to be silent.”—Madeleine Albright
Much has been written about women and voice. Recently, the World Bank commissioned a study on gender equality and development, sending teams to 20 countries around the globe to talk with women, in part, about voice. The World Bank’s definition: “Voice is being able to speak up and be heard, and to shape and share in discussions, discourse and decisions.”
Often, voice discussions focus on how women need “fixing,” our voices, tones and speech patterns need to be transformed in order for us to be considered credible enough to attain equal leadership-level representation, even to receive equal pay.
“In life, finding a voice is speaking and living the truth. Each of you is an original. Each of you has a distinctive voice. When you find it, your story will be told. You will be heard. ” -John Grisham
The late great leadership guru Dr. Stephen Covey, (author of the international best seller The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People) , suggests asking yourself these four questions to find your voice :
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What are you good at? That’s your mind.
- What do you love doing? That’s your heart.
- What need do you serve? That’s your body.
- What is life asking you? That’s your spirit; meaning & purpose.
“Your voice is your ambassador to the outside world.”—Norman Hogikyan, MD
Dr. Norman Hogikyan specializes in Otolaryngology, the study of ear, nose, and throat conditions. He contends that voice “portrays your personality and emotions. People make assessments about you based on your voice, so it is very important when you’re speaking or singing to think about what people are really hearing.”
Like our bodies, we need to warm-up, flex, stretch, and develop our voices. Hogikyan and colleagues offer us 10 Tips for a Healthy Voice : hydration, what foods to avoid, how humidity in your office/home helps, and the importance of “vocal naps.” Avoid yelling, screaming and otherwise straining your voice. In other words, don’t run a marathon after only training to climb a flight of stairs. Another key voice health suggestion: pay attention to how you speak every day.
“Raise your words, not your voice. It is rain that grows flowers, not thunder.”—Rumi
At times, I ask my coaching clients to record themselves reading a poem, speech, or even a children’s story that inspires them. This isn’t about making public presentations—it’s not voice coaching either—it’s a reflection time, a chance to listen to one’s own voice, something that doesn’t happen for most of us, at least not very often.
We listen together. We might talk about energy and breath and confidence. We spend a little time on speed, slowing things down. Most importantly, we get really comfortable hearing that voice, its beauty, its uniqueness, its loveliness, the very “YOU-ness” of it. We identify what there is to love, love, love about your voice.
Using our voices to take stands and shape conversations requires a level of comfort and practice, a level of love—not fixing.
Record Your Voice, Listen to It: What Do You Love About It?
#inCourage Leading, Jone
Learn more about Ann Quasman at WomanTalk.com and answer her 5 brilliant, provocative questions. Well, 6 questions if you have the courage to surprise us.
I am delighted to share an event with you that I suspect you will really, really enjoy —