As we move toward a new year, I love looking back over the one completed. Not a subscriber to Thoreau’s “never look back unless you are planning to go that way,” I try to figure out what I spent the most time reflecting upon.
If I’d used some kind of cool app that monitored my 2013 thoughts (which thank goodness I didn’t, because that’s creepy, and thank goodness the NSA hasn’t figured out a way to do this to us, or maybe they have, but I digress), I have to admit it: I probably spent as much time thinking about myself as anything or anyone else!
Gulp, it might be true. And, on the heels of my “Why I love George” post last week. A post, by the way, that talked about how amazing I think George Saunders is at reminding me that I’m not the center of the universe. But then, that’s back to me again.
American Time Use
Taking a look at what data are collected by our government, (American Time Use survey, http://www.bls.gov/tus/charts/ ), I found that they do keep track of our time. At least if you have kids (which I do not). Or maybe there is a single person chart? But after 10 minutes of searching for the single person chart (come on, government, there are over 102 million 18 and up singles here, get with it), I decided that my time would be better spent in conversation with you.
How we spend our time is somewhat about choice. Obviously, as the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics tells us, we actually have very little time beyond work, if we’re lucky enough to have work, so we’d better choose wisely.
This past year, I tried to make more mindful choices around time than I have in the past.
Help, Thanks, Wow
Recovering from about 20 years of unhealthy workaholism — the 70 – 80 hour a week kind — I spent alot more time being grateful in 2013. As the incomparable writer Annie Lamott recommends, using “Help, Thanks, Wow: The Three Essential Prayers” helps immensely. Those three words are really all one needs in meditation, prayer, a gratitude journal or whatever practice you choose to use when you reflect.
In 2013, I also tried to spend time doing things that are meaningful to me outside of work. One thing I’ve loved doing is volunteering for worldpulse.com . I periodically serve as a World Pulse volunteer “Listener,” reading and giving comments on women’s writing. Women from 190 countries around the globe are using their voices to expose inhumane situations. What a positive impact they have had on me – their villages, cities and countries — and the entire world. That choice of time spent was well worth it!
Since I spend considerable time thinking about injustice, especially poverty and how it impacts women and children, I made the choice a couple of years ago to give less money but instead, share more of my time. For several years, I devoted some time to an extraordinary youth leadership program in St. Louis.
Now, it is time to choose another way to put my time toward a poverty and injustice solution. How grateful I am to carry the learning, memories and friendships forward! And, I am incredibly excited about finding new ways to share my time to try and make a difference on a local level. Reflecting upon 2013 has helped me realize that for me, the local level is definitely the right space to make a difference.
Reflection Makes Change, Choice Possible
While I didn’t spend as much time in 2013 talking and being with my “manchu” — my chosen family — that gives me something to focus on next year. And, laughing with my Mom today, we both realized that we spend a little too much time and energy worrying about things that may or not happen. Using a magnet, I just put this message up on Mom’s fridge:
Worry is like a rocking chair — it gives you something to do but doesn’t get you anywhere.” — Erma Bombeck
Next year, I’m definitely going to take Erma’s advice.
Over this holiday season and throughout 2014, may you spend your time reflecting, choosing with whom and what you spend your time doing as much as you possibly can. And importantly, just spend time being your amazing self — there’s only one of you, after all.
#PeaceHug
